the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
