Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I love you.
Bad choice
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
