No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
