You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize