The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
sex in a hospital.. check
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize