Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
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