im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize