butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
