It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Randomize
