Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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