I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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