Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Life is so much better after having sex.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
