I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
