I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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