Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(208): View more from Idaho

I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy

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(505): View more from New Mexico

Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.

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(914): View more from New York

What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?

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(845): View more from New York

that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(315): View more from New York

dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you

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(925): View more from California

First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.

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(519): View more from Ontario

please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen

(1-519): View more from Ontario

i can't, we're worse now

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(330): View more from Ohio

If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.

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