I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
he's gonorrhea incarnate
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
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