dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
