also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
We have so much sex to catch up on
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Randomize
