OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize