i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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