I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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