i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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