My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
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