one might say we're banned from that church
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
