So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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