but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
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