My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Pooping to opera.
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