You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
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