therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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