Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
