I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
