I wanna bring you to show and tell
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Randomize
