can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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