careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
