do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize