hotel room ftw
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
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