he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Randomize
