I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Randomize
