moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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