Texts From Last Night

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  (310): View more from California

  and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity

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  (310): and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity http://tfl.nu/4zrt
  Replies (44) Good night (15602) Bad night (1313)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??

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  (314): DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT?? http://tfl.nu/2vmn
  Replies (13) Good night (5929) Bad night (1894)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.

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  (773): Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night. http://tfl.nu/t8p9
  Replies (6) Good night (3085) Bad night (1699)
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  (662): View more from Mississippi

  i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up

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  (662): i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up http://tfl.nu/hogm
  Replies (5) Good night (700) Bad night (2127)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.

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  (303): They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome. http://tfl.nu/wbzs
  Replies (23) Good night (4243) Bad night (1013)
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  (587): View more from Alberta

  My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween

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  (587): My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween http://tfl.nu/z2rb
  Replies (15) Good night (3343) Bad night (1198)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.

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  (812): She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila. http://tfl.nu/arvl
  Replies (5) Good night (2659) Bad night (1053)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.

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  (602): Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk. http://tfl.nu/8anb
  Replies (11) Good night (3020) Bad night (815)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.

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  (412): Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab. http://tfl.nu/yqci
  Replies (5) Good night (1310) Bad night (660)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?

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  (518): Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings? http://tfl.nu/b1ds
  Replies (3) Good night (773) Bad night (580)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...

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  (269): It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom... http://tfl.nu/xo96
  Replies (4) Good night (910) Bad night (575)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.

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  (865): Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night. http://tfl.nu/toib
  Replies (0) Good night (376) Bad night (545)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.

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  (210): It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked. http://tfl.nu/smzj
  Replies (3) Good night (572) Bad night (365)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter

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  (774): who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly (413): seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter http://tfl.nu/tftx
  Replies (0) Good night (380) Bad night (266)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend

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  (775): He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend http://tfl.nu/drlt
  Replies (5) Good night (98) Bad night (242)

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