Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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