im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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