what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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