I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
