adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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