i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Randomize