"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
