im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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