guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize