I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
