problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
